Hurrah!

Cat out of the way. Won’t have to take it for another twelve months, thank God! Lousy paper. I bet those IIM profs are having a laugh. Nutcases. Or, as the Two Ronnies would put it – Jockstraps. Ha ha. I’m a bloody riot.

If you’re looking for good sandwiches in Madras, come home. Or go to Subway. Really great sandwiches, ridiculous prices, tiny tables and crap ambience. The music was AWFUL. It’s the sort of thing you wouldn’t risk listening to without earplugs. A mix between Cacofonix and My Heart Will Go On. Well, Cacofonix is okay. Apparently, the songs were Hindi remix videos. You know – BabyH, BabyDoll, BabyShutupandgotobed etc. Funnily enough, I’ve watched a lot of these videos, but I couldn’t recognize the songs. Maybe next time I should turn the volume up. On second thoughts, maybe not. But I’ll stop cribbing, I liked my sandwich.

Some of the ads on TV these days are atrocious. The VIP Frenchie X ad features this lovely lacy pair of pink knickers flying through the air, until it lands on the same clothesline as the men’s (massive) Frenchie X. It’s explicit, it’s disgusting, and it seems to be on 24 hours a day. What were those ad execs thinking? A more pertinent question would be: 'What were those ad execs drinking?!?'. This is what watching cricket is like these days:

--INDIA BATTING--
Manjrekar: Dravid, facing McGrath… he’s on 2… and that’s Bowled Him!!! Through the gate, McGrath will be delighted with…
--CUT TO ADS(Manjrekar still talking)--
Irritating colorful lines appear on screen. Hutch TV. Nausea.
Knickers fly through air, copulate with Frenchie X
More Hutch TV. Nose bleed this time.
--BACK TO THE MATCH --
Manjrekar(still talking): And it’s Laxman facing the last ball of the over… beautiful shot, that’s gone for four through mid wicket, super start to Laxman’s inni…
--CUT TO ADS again!--
More vertical lines. Hutch TV. Dandruff.
AIRTEL ad. Stupid girl calls her dad from the depths of the Amazon. I recall Arvind couldn’t call HIS dad from DELHI, and he uses Airtel. Propaganda.
Hutch TV yet again. I look for something to throw at the TV, but the cricket’s back, thank God.

Anyway, you get the picture. I’ll go watch some cricket now.

the clock is ticking

CAT around the corner, nervous as hell. Studying, sleeping, studying, eating, sleeping, playing on the computer, writing blogs for twenty seconds a week... hang on, time's up

of monkeys and politics

A couple of things I want to get off my chest. Well, more than a couple of things, to be honest. I’ve been thinking a lot about monkeys of late. I know, I know, mantids first, now monkeys – I seem to have a theme running here. But technically, I didn’t really talk about mantids in the first blog, so its not Really a theme.

Anyway, monkeys, after humans, are the most intelligent beings on this planet. Well, maybe I shouldn’t say that. Humans are technologically advanced, but I’m not sure we’re intelligent AT all. I mean, just look at America. 120 MILLION voters (human, most of them, surely) helped re-elect a Monkey to the post of The Most Powerful Man in the Universe. I’m sure even HE can’t believe his luck. After four years of war-mongering (against nations that have less money than Wyoming), tax cuts (to the rich and powerful), lying (to everyone but his wife), drug abuse (not really, but its fun to say it) and Errors in pronunciation and grammar, the people still love him! Well, 53 million of them do, anyway. Although I suspect they voted for him because he’s a lot funnier than Kerry. And we all love our comedians, don’t we? Humbug.

Ironically, if the power to vote in America had been given to monkeys (don’t put it past them, ANYthing’s possible in America), Kerry would have won. Not sure what this says about his mass appeal, but hey, at least monkeys are more intelligent than humans (except for Bush, who has all the intelligence of a pizza), as America proved yesterday. I know, I know… I’ve just contradicted myself, but we all have our vices.

Oh, and if any of the people reading this are Bush supporters, I’m sorry, but please check yourselves into the nearest mental institution. Or the White House. We don’t live in a concrete jungle anymore... it’s more like a Human Zoo. Hang on, hang on… Ah! Catharsis.

Coming Soon: How to distinguish a Donkey from an Ass, and other useful tips better living.

Quote of the Day: “He is the only bull I know who carries his own china closet with him”
- Winston Churchill on (then) US Secretary of State John Dulles
Its sort of... Apt, isn’t it?