not really about South Park

I was about to take a shower when this irrational fear gripped me. Most bathrooms have locks on the outside as well as the inside of the door, right? The bathroom at my house in Madras has TWO doors – one leading into the bedroom, the other opening out onto the living room. And both have locks on the outside. For some reason, I started worrying about what it would be like if, by chance, BOTH doors were locked from the outside, I was stuck inside, and there was no one else at home. Kinda scary, because the only other way out would be through the window, and it would take a file to get through those bars. Hmmm… Maybe we should keep files in all our bathrooms. Anyway, the doors weren’t locked (from the outside), and I got out okay. End of. (I belong in the loony bin.)

In any case, today I thought I’d write about a topic which really pisses me off. A lot of you might have watched this episode of South Park called ‘Cartman joins N.A.M.B.L.A’.

The episode basically starts with (8-year old) Cartman telling his little friends that they weren’t mature enough to be friends with him, and that he wanted to find older, more mature friends. (‘Screw you guys, I’m going home’)

He goes home, gets online, and enters several chat rooms, introducing himself as “a young boy wanting to meet mature men for fun times”. Predictably, 500,000 paedophiles reply, and he selects one to go out with. On their ‘date’, the older man is arrested (with good reason), and Cartman is very, very pissed off, because he thinks his friends are trying to sabotage his attempts to have a ‘mature’ relationship. To cut a long story short, Cartman eventually chances upon ‘NAMBLA’ – The North American Man-Boy Love Association, an organization whose only goal is to legalize sexual relations between men and boys as young as 8 years old (they actually have 2 goals – the other involves love between a man and a boy, but you probably figured that out). The episode, as you would expect, descends into farce (as most of these episodes do), but the end is pretty good.

Oh well, I thought. Funny episode, that.

It never really occurred to me that such an organization could exist. It just seemed… unfeasible. And disgusting. And illegal. And very, Very disturbing.

And then I picked up this book last night, by a talk-show host named Bill O’Reilly. In the first chapter, he talks about an interview he did with a lawyer for the American Civil Liberties Union, a national organization which defends the right to free thinking/speech/action etc. Before I continue, let me just say that this could only happen in the United States.

NAMBLA exists in real life. They have a website (which I imagine would be nauseating, if I ever visit it), and they actually advocate sex between men and boys. They are, of course, under the notion that there’s nothing wrong with what they’re doing. Sickos.

This repulsive organization is actually canvassing to bring about a law change which would allow them to offer physical ‘comfort’ to as many kids as possible. And the ACLU supports them. In fact, the ACLU, which is one of the richest, most powerful advocates of free speech in the world, is pumping millions and millions of dollars into defending these slimeballs whenever they’re taken to court by (justifiably) shocked/disgusted people who have been directly or indirectly affected by NAMBLA.

Only in America. I don’t know what else to say.